


Not Even for a Moment

by schweinsteiger



Category: Rope (1948)
Genre: M/M, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-24
Updated: 2018-03-24
Packaged: 2019-04-07 10:02:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14078454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schweinsteiger/pseuds/schweinsteiger
Summary: In boarding school Brandon and Phillip are quick to become inseparable.





	Not Even for a Moment

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from Plato's Symposium ("And when one of them meets with his other half... the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy, and one will not be out of the other's sight, as I may say, even for a moment").
> 
> Full disclosure I wrote this when I was 16 (two years ago). Not to say I hate it or anything (I wouldn't post it if that were the case)... I just wanted to acknowledge that this is a little old.

Phillip liked to consider himself a decent student, or at least decent enough to keep a low profile and out of trouble, so he was somewhat cross with himself when he managed to get sent to Monday detention. Not that he felt guilty or even agreed with the school’s mandatory Sunday congregation; he’d just believed himself above getting caught skipping. And Monday detention was such a dull affair. All he was permitted to do was sit at a table and wait.

Disregarding these permissions, though, a boy, about ten minutes late, sat down across from Phillip. The room was fairly empty and full of unoccupied tables, so Phillip, curious, lifted his head from its tabletop resting place to study the face in front of him. It belonged to Brandon Shaw, whom he recognized from both class and Mr. Cadell’s out-of-class discussions. Brandon’s stare was direct and he smiled when Phillip’s eyes met his.

“You’ve never been here before, Phillip.” He half whispered, half spoke, seemingly unable to find a comfortable low-volume voice.

“No, I haven’t.” Phillip rested his chin in his hand and looked past Brandon, though at nothing in particular. He assumed this was the end of their interaction. Rather, Brandon spoke again with an off-putting excitement in his voice and a disconcerting grin on his face.

“What… what did you do?”

Phillip blinked slowly and focused his vision back on Brandon, who was staring at him expectantly, his grin still threatening in its unfamiliarity. He thought for a moment, his eyes panning down to Brandon’s tightly clasped hands. “I didn’t go to congregation.”

Brandon cocked his head and reclined back in his chair. “That’s all?”

“Yeah.”

“How predictable of the administration to punish a student for not conforming to their narrow minded views.” He paused and seemed to study Phillip’s face as he leaned forward. “That is, assuming you don’t believe in God. You don’t, right?”

Phillip was unwilling to fall into any trap and replied with an evasive “Do you?”

Brandon smiled wide and Phillip could see it in his eyes as well as his mouth. “That means you don’t.” He waited a moment and tried obviously to feign nonchalance, raising a fist to rest his cheek on while his other hand’s index finger traced something on the table. “Don’t worry. I don’t either. It’s all very ridiculous.”

Phillip hummed in casual assent, then, taking the bait Brandon had not yet explicitly laid out, asked what he did to be in detention.

Brandon answered with pride, “They finally found me out after curfew. It must’ve been luck that caused them to run into me – I’ve gone so many nights without being caught.”

“What do you do past curfew?”

Brandon’s eyes lit up at Phillip’s display of interest but his answer didn’t seem to match his clear desire to overshare. “Nothing, really. I just do it to get out of here.”

“Mm.”

Neither spoke for a moment and Phillip felt that this interaction was quite surreal. He’d seen Brandon around since grade school, though they’d hardly acknowledged each other and frankly he had been intimidating to ten year old Phillip. He was tall and looming and got in trouble all the time even though he always had the right answers in class. But now Phillip was sixteen and he and Brandon were conversing and Brandon was acting as though Phillip were his good friend. And Brandon was staring at him with confidence that never faltered and it made Phillip feel strange and vulnerable. Then Brandon asked Phillip what dorm he lived in and Phillip told him and Brandon promised to stop by and Phillip didn’t know if he wanted that but didn’t have the nerve to say so.

When Brandon did stop by a day or two later Phillip was in his pajamas and his dorm mate, Kenneth, was trying to sleep. Phillip whispered to Brandon through the barely-open door that he didn’t want to be involved in any after-curfew activities and Kenneth pulled a pillow over his own head, yelling at the two to shut up. Brandon told Phillip to come with him and grabbed his hand.

“Brandon, I’m serious. I don’t want to get caught.” Phillip said in as low yet firm a voice as he could as Brandon led him down the hallway.

“Trust me, Phillip. We won’t get caught.” Brandon squeezed Phillip’s hand tighter, though not so tight that it was uncomfortable. He led Phillip to an unassuming door and opened it slowly as to keep quiet, but every creak made Phillip cringe. They managed to get outside without incident, though. Phillip had envisioned something big happening once out but all Brandon did was sit down in the grass and stare at him. So Phillip sat next to him and once again waited for something to happen, but nothing did. All Brandon did was recline onto his back and make a comment about the weather being nice.

“It is.” Phillip didn’t care to show too much positivity, repeatedly reminding himself he was angry about this whole situation. The weather _was_ very nice, though. It was cold but not so cold he felt frozen in his pajamas. Plus, the sky was clear and he could’ve sworn he saw a shooting star. But this was irrelevant because he was angry and no, he couldn’t be lured into this nonsense. In lieu of engaging Brandon he stuck to sitting cross-legged and entertaining himself by pulling at the grass in front of him.

“How have you been?” Brandon asked in too calming a voice.

“Tired, Brandon. I’ve had loads of work for the past few days and was ready to get into bed when you interrupted.”

Brandon seemed unaffected by Phillip’s retort. “I’ll help you with all that. We’ll be a good team.”  He turned his head to look at Phillip. “Also, nobody’s stopping you from sleeping.”

“That’s not the point – ”

“What classes do you have work for?”

Phillip sighed. “English and Biology.”

“We’re in English together. You mean the essay?”

“Yeah.”

“I finished that. I’ll help you with it tomorrow after classes end.”

Phillip didn’t accept or decline Brandon’s offer, choosing instead to remain silent. Soon he said “I’m going back to my dorm.”

Brandon sat up. “Fine. Let’s go.” He got on his feet and offered a hand to pull Phillip up. Phillip took it despite that he had no need for help.

“I only said _I_ was going back – you don’t have to leave.”

Brandon stood still for a moment, his hand still holding onto Phillip’s. He then let go and said that it’d be rude not to guide him back.

When they found themselves standing in front of the door to Phillip’s room, Brandon said that see, he’d told Phillip to trust him; they really didn’t get caught. Phillip agreed reluctantly and went inside to try to get at least a few hours of sleep.

In English the next day Brandon talked with Phillip for as long as he could before Mr. Cadell told everybody to go to their assigned seats. Brandon’s seat was in the center of the very first row and Phillip felt glad that they couldn’t see each other’s faces because if the seating hadn’t been the way it was he was sure Brandon would’ve done all he could to distract him. Phillip did notice, though, that every so often, when Mr. Cadell’s back faced the class, Brandon would turn his head a little and stare at Phillip. Each time this happened Phillip felt heat in his cheeks and he pretended that he was too enthralled by some book to notice or acknowledge the glances.

English was the only class Brandon and Phillip shared, so the rest of the day was relatively the normal. In History Kenneth asked Phillip what the deal was in their dorm the night before and Phillip stated honestly that he had no idea.

“Wasn’t that Brandon Shaw?” Kenneth asked.

“Yeah.”

“I never knew you two were friends.”

“We’re not.”

“Mm. Don’t wake me up again.”

And that was it. But classes soon ended and Phillip had no choice but to wait and see whether Brandon was going to follow through on his offer from the night before. Phillip had slightly exaggerated when he’d complained about his work; he was doing quite well in all his classes. It had just been the only complaint that came to mind outside in the grass when he felt he needed to complain about _something_. He didn’t want Brandon’s help. He never asked for it and never agreed to it and he really didn’t need it. There was a knock on the door and Phillip opened it to see Brandon smiling in front of him.

He immediately suggested they go to the library and Phillip said it was a fine idea, so they walked together and sat down next to each other at a table. Brandon asked Phillip what his essay was on and Phillip told him it was about _The Metamorphosis_. The general assignment had been to take a piece of literature with many different interpretations and write about it. Brandon said he was doing _The Symposium_ and then went on about how he was the only student Mr. Cadell would allow to write about that. Phillip had never read _The Symposium_ so he didn’t entirely get what Brandon was saying.

“How much do you have so far?” Brandon asked.

Phillip thought for a few seconds then said in a small voice, “I actually have it all written.”

Brandon laughed an encouraging laugh and told Phillip he’d thought it out of character for him to be behind on work, so this was unsurprising.

“We can still help each other, though,” He added. “Tomorrow we can read each other’s papers and give feedback.”

Phillip nodded then Brandon got up and touched his shoulder and told him to come. They walked to the common space and once again sat down next to each other, this time on a couch. Phillip sat at the end and Brandon sat down close to him. Phillip was unsure of when or how it got there but soon Brandon’s arm was slinked around his back and he felt like if he moved in the slightest something would go wrong. His worries were vague but he just knew he didn’t want to ruin the position the two were in, so he focused his effort into not moving.

“How are you, Phillip?” Brandon turned his head to look Phillip in the eyes and it felt very strange and crowded because of their proximity so Phillip only turned a little towards Brandon.

“I’m fine,” Phillip rushed. Brandon sighed and lifted the arm that had been resting on Phillip’s shoulders. Phillip was fraught and wanted to say something to let him know he didn’t mind the arm but in seconds he felt a hand on the nape of his neck and couldn’t complain one bit. Brandon played soothingly with Phillip’s hair and Phillip felt himself shiver with each touch. He held his hands together in his lap and watched all the other boys chatting and laughing with each other. A few silent minutes passed like this, then Phillip decided to ask Brandon how he was doing. At this point he wasn’t just humoring Brandon’s sudden attempt at friendship; he was beginning to genuinely care.

Brandon’s hand stopped moving and he said “I’m great.” He started on Phillip’s neck again. “We’re close friends, Phillip.” With his inflection it sounded like a reminder or reassurance or something like that. He said it as if Phillip had just stated otherwise, but he hadn’t. If he had it wouldn’t have been too off, though, seeing as the two had only just began to hang out together. Phillip hummed in as neutral tone he could and leaned his head back, forcing Brandon to remove his hand for lack of space. He saw a boy who was walking by stop and stare at them before beginning to amble over. Brandon sighed audibly and most likely just for dramatic purposes.

Once there, the boy immediately hopped onto the couch and lay down, his head on Brandon’s lap. He grinned at Phillip and said hello while offering a hand to shake, though it was difficult in his position. Phillip contorted his arm to accept the handshake as he gave a subdued greeting. Meanwhile, Brandon had put his arm back around Phillip, holding tightly, and inched as close towards him as he could without ending up on top of him. He had a distinct grimace on his face.

“You’re Phillip!” said the boy, who Phillip could swear he recognized from class or maybe just from being around the school. The name was Kentley or Kentry or something like that.

“And you’re… David?”

The boy, David, nodded and continued to smile from his position on Brandon’s lap. Brandon’s free hand lay on David’s stomach.

“David is my dorm mate.” Brandon said flatly, though he seemed to be slowly losing his anger.

“Ah.” Phillip watched Brandon’s hand idly scratch at David’s shirt, fingers sometimes running over the buttons, as he felt Brandon’s other hand squeeze his shoulder, his thumb moving in gentle circles.

“Brandon wants me to switch dorms with you, or he wants to switch dorms with Kenneth.” David said absentmindedly. “I like Kenneth. But it’s such a hassle. And for what, so we can get reprimanded for breaking the rules?” He looked up at Phillip with the last sentence but Brandon’s knee jerked and made David hit his head. David gave a half-joking angry “hey!” and elbowed Brandon in the ribs before sitting up.

“You want to change dorms?” Phillip asked, looking at Brandon. Brandon placed both hands in his lap.

“You do see who I have to deal with. I’d much rather live with you.”

“Oh.”

David snorted and said “screw you” with no real contempt then got up and invited Phillip to come along with him and Brandon to their dorm. You know, to check out the space that would _always_ belong to _David_ and Brandon and never to _Phillip_ and Brandon. But Brandon said he was staying where he was so Phillip did the same.

“Do you really not like David?” Phillip asked when he was comfortable that the two weren’t in anyone's earshot.

Brandon didn’t answer for a moment but ended up saying “He’s very irritating at times.”

Phillip’s voice grew softer and more tentative. “Did you really ask him about switching dorms?” He felt it was odd of Brandon if he had done so.

Brandon stood and held out his hand. Phillip grabbed it and allowed himself to be pulled up. Once he was on his feet Brandon said “Let’s go.” Then, less authoritatively, “I did.”

“Mm.” Phillip decided not to comment on it. “Where are we going?”

Brandon shrugged. “Where do you want to go?”

Phillip shrugged as well, not used to making decisions around Brandon. He settled on his default location: “My dorm?” He added quickly, “I doubt Kenneth is there.”

Brandon smiled and began to walk. Phillip walked beside him.

They found that Phillip was right about Kenneth’s absence, so Brandon settled in, relaxed. He sat cross-legged on Phillip’s bed and Phillip took the chair from the desk and sat on it the wrong way so he could lean his elbows on the back. They looked at each other in silence, then Brandon asked Phillip what he did in his free time.

“I play piano.” He paused. “Well, there isn’t one in here, but I do play.” Another pause. “Here I read.”

Brandon leaned on the wall and closed his eyes while humming in approval. Phillip looked closer at him with the security of him not knowing and noted that he really liked how Brandon appeared. He was usually put-together and clean but now his guard was down and his hair was the slightest bit disheveled and his tie was loose around his neck and it all fit him well. Brandon wasn’t bad to have around.

At dinner Phillip’s assigned seat was next to boys he didn’t know well so he spent the time eating and listening passively. At one point he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around to see Brandon, who had come over to say he’d meet back at Phillip’s dorm after the meal ended. Phillip tried to suppress an amused smile throughout the rest of dinner.

When Phillip returned to his dorm he changed into pajamas then sat on Kenneth’s bed and fiddled with the tassels on a blanket. There was a knock on the door and Phillip opened it to let in Brandon, who promptly took his place on the bed he’d been in before. He said he wanted to rest in the comfort of a David-free room then lay down on top of the sheets, his eyes closed. Kenneth then walked in, and, upon the sight of Brandon, glared at Phillip. Phillip got off of his bed and took a seat in the chair. Kenneth asked why, if Brandon and Phillip weren’t friends, there was a third person in their room. Phillip was watching Brandon and noticed him frown just a bit when Kenneth said they weren’t friends.

“We… we’re close friends.” Phillip said quickly, studying Brandon’s face carefully. He seemed to brighten at this.

“Okay. When is he leaving?”

Phillip turned to face Kenneth and shrugged. “I think he’s asleep.”

Kenneth said that sure, if Phillip wanted nowhere to sleep, this was fine. Phillip shrugged again and looked at the clock. It was 9:00. Kenneth usually went to bed around 10:00. Phillip knew he didn’t want to try to wake Brandon while Kenneth was awake lest he admit defeat in their battle of wills, so he grabbed a book to pass the time. After too long a wait, Kenneth settled in bed and told Phillip to turn off the lights. Phillip did so and sat back down on his chair. Without light he couldn’t read well, so he switched between looking at Brandon and checking to see if Kenneth was asleep. At 10:37 Phillip decided Kenneth was sound enough asleep so he walked over to his bed and tapped Brandon on the shoulder.

“Wake up, Brandon. Go to your own dorm.”

Brandon didn’t reply. In fact, Phillip was pretty sure he saw Brandon’s eyes shut tighter, but it could’ve been his imagination. Phillip stood for a while, unsure, before giving up and getting into his bed with Brandon. It would’ve been rude to wake him up. He just hoped he himself would wake up before the other two in the room in order to avoid any uncomfortable explanations. He turned his back to Brandon and lay as close to the edge of the bed as he could without falling off. When he almost did fall off he decided that he could allow himself to move closer to Brandon if he made sure he wouldn’t fall into too deep a sleep, so he scooted what he thought was just a few inches to the center of the bed and found that Brandon had, too, shifted towards the center. They weren’t touching, though, which Phillip made sure of. That is, until he felt movement and then an arm on his chest. Brandon must have been the type to toss and turn and Phillip felt guilty for taking up room, but it was his bed, so he moved closer until his back was against Brandon’s chest and now felt sure he wouldn’t fall off. Especially with the security of Brandon’s arm around him. He would’ve moved the arm off but he was a very considerate person and didn’t want to disturb Brandon’s sleep.

Phillip did not end up sleeping lightly as he had hoped. When he opened his eyes he noticed that Kenneth’s bed was empty. So was the room, so he must have gone to breakfast. Phillip wanted to move to get ready for breakfast as well but he realized Brandon’s arm was still holding him so he stayed as he was. Brandon must have been tired from staying up past curfew so often so Phillip didn’t want to keep him from getting a good rest.

After about ten minutes of trying to focus on breathing in sync with Brandon in order to pass the time Phillip was startled by Brandon’s voice, hot on the back of his neck.

“Good morning, Phillip.”

Phillip tried to turn a little towards Brandon but he was still underneath his arm so he only managed to move a few degrees.

“Good morning.”

Brandon sat up and stretched his arms. Phillip’s racing heart started to slow down, seeing that Brandon didn’t seem at all angry to wake up how he did. Still, Phillip took the opportunity to slide out of the bed and onto the empty chair.

“What’s the time?” Brandon asked. Phillip told him it was 8:50.

“We’ve practically missed breakfast, then,” Brandon noted. His face revealed he was content despite this. “Sorry about that.”

“You must have been pretty tired to sleep for so long.”

Brandon smirked and said “I must have been.”

“Also, don’t get angry with me for what I did. You forced me into an odd situation. Kenneth must already think ill of me.”

Brandon smiled more and said he wasn’t angry at all but didn’t acknowledge the comment about Kenneth. Then he stood and scrunched up his face upon looking down at the wrinkles in his uniform. Phillip laughed a little before going to to grab his own uniform plus a spare jacket he had. “I doubt this will fit you but it’s worth a try.”

Brandon took off his jacket and put on the new one, which was unmistakably way too small on him. They both laughed and Brandon put his rumpled jacket back on. Phillip began to walk out to the bathroom down the hall with clothes in his arms but Brandon told him to stay, so he changed in the room. When he got to fixing up his hair Brandon approached him from behind, which Phillip could see in the mirror, then brushed his fingers against the hand in which Phillip was holding a comb and took the comb before starting to do Phillip’s hair himself. Phillip didn’t like being in front of a mirror now because he could see his cheeks turning pink, so he let his eyes close as Brandon carefully worked.

“Your hair,” Brandon’s voice was soft, “is very becoming. And it’s wonderful to touch.” He massaged Phillip’s scalp at this and Phillip really felt like he had to sit down or walk around or something, anything other than just stand there, but he couldn’t so he tried to stay perfectly still. But he was free soon, as Brandon took one of his hands and gave back the comb before stepping back and saying something that Phillip couldn’t make out through the heavy pounding in his ears. Phillip put the comb down and finished getting ready.

He said, “I’m going to class. I like to be there a few minutes early.”

“So do I.” Brandon ran a hand through his own hair. “Good thing it’s English, huh? We get to walk together.”

Phillip nodded and walked out the door, hardly thinking to hold it open. Brandon had to step quickly to stay beside him.

“I’ll bring my paper to your dorm after classes so we can read each other’s.”

Phillip stopped walking for a second. “We can meet in the library.”

“Oh. Okay.”

At the library that afternoon the two sat next to each other again and exchanged papers. Before beginning to read, Brandon said “I think you’ll like mine. At the least it will interest you.”

Phillip read and felt a strange feeling in his chest. If he was understanding this correctly, Brandon believed love between men was the highest form of love, and Phillip wasn’t sure if he’d ever known anybody who felt that way before.

“Are… are you sure Mr. Cadell will be okay with this?”

“He’s an intellectual, Phillip.” Brandon put Phillip’s paper down. “This is good. I marked some basic corrections, and I’d suggest adding an explanation of the translation of the word used in the original German.”

“Okay. I think yours is, uh, good… but you’re sure this is allowed? I don’t want you to be punished.”

Brandon smiled and laughed a little. “I told you, Mr. Cadell gave me permission. He likes me.”

“Okay.”

Brandon looked into Phillip’s eyes. “D-do you really like it, Phillip?”

“I… I do. It’s well written.”

“I knew you would.” His cheek was resting on the heel of his palm as he watched Phillip, his face softer than usual. Phillip shifted in his seat and tried to subtly look around to see who else was in the library; it was fairly empty, but not entirely so. He looked back at Brandon through the corner of his eye and kept his hands in his lap. A knee brushed against his own and stayed where it was. “Do you think Kenneth is in your dorm right now?”

Phillip’s heart skipped a beat and it suddenly felt hard to talk but he managed to sputter out “He rarely is.”

“Let’s go then.”

“Okay.”

Brandon led the way, his strange smile never breaking. Phillip was nervous but wasn’t entirely sure of why. Kenneth wasn’t there when he opened the door to his dorm. Brandon took his seat on Phillip’s bed and Phillip on his chair.

“Phillip, I believe in what I wrote,” Brandon said, looking at Phillip. Phillip looked back but was careful not to make eye contact, too scared to reveal anything.

“I’m sure.”

“Don’t you?” Brandon asked as if he knew the answer.

“I hadn’t given it much thought before.”

Brandon laughed a little. “I’m not trying to set you up, Phillip. I wouldn’t do that to you; you’re too smart.”

Phillip felt himself blush.

“Sit with me,” said Brandon. Phillip obeyed, sitting on his bed a few feet away from Brandon. Brandon looked mildly disappointed by the distance and placed a hand on the sheets between him and Phillip. Phillip wanted to place his own hand on top of Brandon’s but didn’t, even though Brandon must’ve known. Brandon seemed to know everything. “I’m serious though, Phillip. Do you agree with me?”

“If I didn’t I’d probably have punched you a few times by now.”

Brandon’s eyes widened just slightly and he grinned one of the most genuine grins Phillip had ever seen from him. “Give me your hand,” he said. Phillip did. Their fingers intertwined. “P-put your other one on my cheek.” Phillip did, scooting closer, still avoiding direct eye contact, blushing harder than ever before, heart warming up to the point that it was uncomfortable. With his own free hand Brandon caressed Phillip’s hair. Phillip wanted to shut his eyes and just lie on Brandon’s lap as he ran his hand through his hair. Instead he gathered the courage to look Brandon in the eyes. Immediately he felt an urge that he didn’t dare act upon, but Brandon knew everything, so he must’ve read Phillip’s mind, saying, voice low, “Kiss me.”

“Are you sure?” Phillip asked, voice wobbly.

Brandon laughed. “When am I not?”

He had a point. Phillip let go of Brandon’s hand and moved his own to the sheets to steady himself as he leaned in. The door opened. Phillip jumped up. Brandon sighed. Kenneth entered. It didn’t seem like he’d seen anything, but still, Phillip’s heart was pounding. First sleeping in the same bed, now this.

“Oh. Hello, Brandon,” were Kenneth’s first words upon finally noticing he wasn’t alone in the room. He didn’t sound as hostile as usual. Phillip’s heartbeat began to slow down.

“Hi, Kenneth,” Brandon said, voice never faltering. Phillip envied his ability to be so nonchalant.

“Brandon was just leaving, Kenneth, so don’t worry,” Phillip said, facing Brandon. Brandon raised his eyebrows and stood up.

“Yes. I was leaving.” He placed a hand on Phillip’s shoulder and leaned in to say in his ear, “I’ll stop by after curfew.” His thumb rubbed against Phillip’s shoulder for a few seconds before he let go and left.

“You think I despise him, don’t you?” Kenneth asked, surprising Phillip.

“I don’t think you like him.”

“I don’t mind him as much as you think. You could’ve let him stay,” said Kenneth. Phillip laughed a bit.

“No, no. It’s fine. He really was leaving.”

Kenneth shrugged. “Fine.”

Way after dinner, once everybody was supposed to be asleep, Phillip heard a knock on the door. He had stayed awake, knowing to expect Brandon. Kenneth was also awake. He had argued with Phillip, saying he’d heard what Brandon said earlier about stopping by, and that he at least wanted to see the two off if he couldn’t join. Phillip opened the door and stepped out, not giving Brandon the time to come in because he didn’t want Kenneth to have any chance to try to convince them to let him come. “Bye!” Kenneth stage-whispered as the door shut.

“You were wrong about him thinking ill of you,” Brandon said as he walked down the hall.

“I guess I was.”

“He’s alright,” Brandon said, smiling. He opened the door and Phillip was much less frightened by the creaks this time than those few nights before. Once outside Brandon pulled Phillip into a hug. Phillip hugged back, letting his face burrow into Brandon’s shoulder. He didn’t know when the last time was he felt so safe. A few moments passed before Brandon pulled away, his arms still on Phillip.

“N-now kiss me, Phillip.”

It still made his heart skip, even though he could see it coming. Phillip looked at Brandon’s face for a few seconds before leaning in and placing his lips on Brandon’s. He’d never kissed anyone before and he felt out of his element, but Brandon pulled him in closer, assuring him that he wasn’t unwanted. Despite an instance of teeth clacking against each other, the kiss was one Phillip would want to repeat. The warmth shared between them provided a pleasant contrast with the slight chill in the night air.

Brandon was the first to break away, looking around before guiding Phillip to a tree and sitting down, leaning on it. Phillip sat down next to him, shoulders touching shoulders and thighs touching thighs.

“I always knew you were intelligent,” Brandon mused quietly. Phillip didn’t respond, not entirely sure how to accept compliments. Brandon turned to him, mouth to his ear. “Are you tired?”

“Mm,” Phillip hummed. He was tired, but it was a kind of serene tiredness, one that felt like bliss and that didn’t truly threaten him with sleep. Not that he needed to explain all that out loud.

“Rest your head on my lap.”

Phillip obliged gladly, shutting his eyes once his head was in Brandon’s lap and Brandon’s hand was running through his hair. His other hand was on Phillip’s chest. Phillip dared to place his own hand on top of Brandon’s, taking in all that he could. After a few minutes Phillip, still not confident, gathered the courage to open his eyes, get off of Brandon’s lap, and say, “I… want you to kiss me, Brandon.”

Brandon caressed Phillip’s cheek and followed his order without hesitation. The kiss lasted longer than the first, Phillip understanding more what to do. One hand rubbed the front of Brandon’s chest while the other held onto the back of his head. Pretty soon he couldn’t contain the smile he felt coming on so he broke the kiss and gave Brandon a quick hug before lying back down on his lap. Brandon laughed.

Phillip was still smiling as he snuck back to his dorm and got in bed.

**Author's Note:**

> Unsurprisingly my favorite trope is the use of gay media by one character to gauge another character's interest in them (if that's common enough to be considered a trope).


End file.
